Welcome to our state of the art zombie research center.

Our research team has been collecting data since 1968. We have no idea what the data is used for, but we do know several things. While zombies may or may not appreciate the fact that we exploit them, one thing we do know is... zombies wear t shirts. So we are not entirely excluding them from the benefits of our research, per se.

We have lots of beakers filled with scary colored liquids that are supposedly from zombies. Every day we routinely run tests on these liquids and report the results in our lab journals. What does this all mean to you?

Absolutely nothing.  Our side business is selling t-shirts.

We are too busy writing data in our journals and creating important graphs on paper to make this website render perfectly in all browsers. Actually, the variety of browsers give the site a more 'edgy' feel with mysterious misalignments and gaps- which is quite grungy and zombie-like in its presentation.

In our remote lab, we have no idea how this website actually looks, aside from a printed screen shot delivered to us by our supply mule. This website's html was all created on a typewriter, then given to an encumbered delivery calf that leaves our compound every month for the nearest village. From there, a little boy takes the typed pages to the nearest city where he trades the typed code for bread for his family. That person then types up the pages in some html editor and uploads it to our web server. So you see it takes months for us to update this web site, and we'd rather be mixing vials of scary zombie liquid.